Tough stuff

When you've been wading into a new position gently, there's nothing quite like getting shoved into the deep end of the pool. A student death over the weekend. Thankfully, I know what I am doing, although all of the experience in the world doesn't make this any easier. When I was having lunch with several folks in Res Life when I first got here, they asked if I had any special areas of expertise, so to speak. I feel like grief and loss kind of fall into that category. And then I wonder what that means. I think some times I have reasoned that it is a way for me to do something constructive with the all of the loss I have known -- and I tend to think that I have in fact known a fair amount of loss, more than the average bear. And, I still think that is true. But then there is the part of me that realizes that every time I sit with someone who is hurting it's almost like pulling off a scab that never quite has a chance to heal. And college students... they are at this point in their lives when the rest of their lives awaits then. Well, I guess technically we are all at that point in our lives, but... When you are 20 years old, your best friend isn't supposed to get hit by a car while she is out jogging. It's going to be a challenging couple of days -- calling hours, funeral... I wasn't involved with that piece of things before. But it is a good feeling to have confidence in myself, to know that I have it in me to do what I have to do (I was listening to Sarah McLachlan earlier today... a most appropriate song) and it is a good feeling to perceive the trust and confidence that has been placed in me. It is at once heady, and humbling.